KonMari: a side-effect

I’m laying in bed with a cold/The Plague and I’m thinking. I’m thinking about some stuff that needs to be out of my head so that I can see if it still makes sense. 

At the start of this year, I had a bit of a revelation in that, so many of my thoughts were really quite negative. I think most people will admit to having negative thoughts, after all, it’s only human to question if our bums really look that big in those jeans. Add in the fact that I’m female, and British, it’s clear that I’m the ideal person to be predisposed to self-criticism. 

But once I started thinking about my negative thoughts, I realised that it’s not just the superficial ones about size, shape, hair colour, that cloud my head all day. 

How many times do I tut because someone didn’t indicate at a roundabout? Roll my eyes because I’m frustrated at a seemingly inept shop assistant? Get ‘pavement rage’?

And delving deeper…

We all have friends who are, shall we say, flaky. Friends who can never empathise with us because our lives are poles apart. Family members that question our judgement. I have, in the past, had profoundly negative thoughts about these things. Not just thoughts, even: entire pages of Facebook messenger conversations that span weeks. 

I’ve ended up asking myself: is this really how I want to live? Is it the best example to set to my sons?


And how can I have positive thoughts about myself when the only thoughts I have about behaviour, loyalty and appearance are those that are critical of others. 

What if I make a new rule? To let it go. Unless someone else’s behaviour intentionally causes harm to me or my loved ones, I’m going to let it go. What do I gain by not letting them off the hook? Nothing. I’m not talking about being passive aggressive. I’m talking about consciously making an effort to not be affected by it. If it’s that serious a slight, maybe I’ll have freed up more mental energy to confront it properly. Tell someone that they’ve hurt my feelings. Help them to understand. Empathise. Then forgive and let it go. 

From now on, I make the effort to have more thoughts that spark joy than those that do not. 

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A day in the life of…

I had a conversation with one of my best friends the other day about having children. Out of the 5 of us, I am the only one with a toe in motherhood so I am sometimes in the position of explaining to a little audience some of the joys of parenting and also some of the things which are unexpectedly hard.

For her benefit, I thought I’d write up and approximation of how my average day goes. It’s long. Really long. And probably littered with spelling mistakes and whatnot but it was typed up in 20 minutes, during nap time and is an honest account of how my day goes. Continue reading

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KonMari method: toiletries, makeup…

I’m not going to lie, I was looking forward to this.

We are pretty liberal with the boys at home when it comes to baby proofing. Our attitude has been to allow them to explore as much as possible and help them to understand what they shouldn’t and shouldn’t touch, how things should be handled carefully etc. It was fine when it was just Seth and I could keep a close eye on him but now I’m outnumbered during the week this approach is a lot harder! No sooner have I rescued my molten brown shower gel from being tipped down the loo than daddy’s aftershave has been thrown down the stairs 🙈

The difficulty is that we have toiletries in several areas of the upstairs (beginning to see a trend here) so it’s nigh on impossible to keep track of everything. And the boys take advantage of my blind spots! Continue reading

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Max: 9 months

I thought I would write a short post about Max now that he has reached 9 months. For me, 9 months, or 40 ish weeks is a special milestone as it marks my baby being outside for as long as he was inside.

I don’t know if it’s something about being a second child but Max is a quietly determined little boy. He never seems to show any signs of achieving his next milestone, he will just suddenly do it. He went from being permanently horizontal to sitting almost perfectly at six months to the day. Exactly two months after that, he suddenly started crawling, after not really showing any sign of being fussed about it. Within a week, he’s mastered it perfectly and boy was he FAST!  Continue reading

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KonMari: progress part II

I know you’ve been on the edge of your seats waiting for this (ha!)

Last post I shared how I kicked off the KonMari blitz in our house with clothes, bed linen and accessories.

Now I’ll show you how we got on with papers. Continue reading

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KonMari method: progress so far…

I thought it might be good to do a little update on what categories we have tackled so far and what our experience has been of the process.

As a reminder, Marie Kondo’s book suggests a radical approach to tidying and decluttering that promises to change the way you look at your possessions forever. She invites you to only keep that which ‘sparks joy’. She also suggests that the most efficient way to tackle your belongings is to tidy by category, not by room.

You might notice that I’m saying ‘we’ instead of ‘I’. That is because D has been fab at getting stuck in with the purge. Initially I think he was sceptical about the severity of what I was proposing, especially when he saw the teeny tiny amount of clothes I’d scaled back to; but I think he’s warmed to it. He even instigated a cleanse of his own wardrobe!

So far we’ve tackled clothes, bed linen and towels, jewellery and accessories, papers, books, CDs and DVDs. It’s taken a while as we’ve had Christmas in-between but now we are in to the New Year I’m eager to get started again. Continue reading

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Plans for 2016

Every blogger I follow seems to be sharing their hopes and plans for 2016 so why not me?

As I said in my post last week I actually really enjoy the goal-setting fever that January inspires in people and I’m a sucker for a few resolutions. Continue reading

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Messy play date

Being a stay-at-home mum is awesome but sometimes it can leave me feeling a little bit, well…bored. I’m sure I’m not alone in this?

Don’t get me wrong, me and the boys keep very busy. We have a few classes and play groups that we go to, we have a day that we generally keep free for running errands, doing shopping that kind of thing and more recently, I’ve been trying to keep a day free for staying at home.

Max naps well at home, but not so much when we are out and about and I feel like it’s sometimes unfair on him to keep expecting him to cut his sleep short just because Seth has a class to go to, or we are going round Tesco’s. He doesn’t seem to mind, Max takes most things in his stride but I think Seth benefits from a day at home every so often as well. The problem is, I sometimes struggle to fill this day at home with activities that are stimulating enough to capture a two year old’s interest and stop me from going a tiny bit crazy. Continue reading

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I must be a bit strange in that I really love January.

Every time I turn on the radio or the TV or have a conversation with friends or family, people are saying how boring January is; what an anti-climax you experience after the excitement and anticipation of Christmas. Continue reading

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Encouraging healthy eating habits

This is one of the main reasons that I wanted to explore baby-led weaning as a method of introducing Seth, and now Max, to solid food.

I have had an unhealthy relationship with food in the past, particularly in my teens and I am aware that as a parent, I have a responsibility to ensure that this is not something my boys have to grapple with. The principles of baby-led weaning feel like a natural way of helping my children to see food as a source of enjoyment; to see sharing a meal with family as much, much more than just a way to get calories in to the body.

I thought I would share some of my personal principles and guidelines for how I encourage the boys to develop their relationship with food and the logic behind them. Continue reading

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